These are MY stories.  All I can talk about is what happened to me after prostate surgery. All cases of prostate cancer are different. Your experience might be better or worse than mine.

Man with firehose

Image by Perry McKenna CC by 2.0

Story #1  First Experience After Prostate Surgery

After my prostate surgery, I was at home taking it easy when the day arrived to have the catheter removed in the doctor’s office. My wife drove me over there and ten minutes later, the catheter was out.

Later that afternoon, I was lying on the sofa taking a nap, when I felt this slight urge to “go.” Why is it that when you sleep or take a nap, you have to take a whizz right after you wake up? What is up with that? Your body just manufactures pee while you sleep, I guess.

Anyway, I dribble-drabble my way over to the toilet, and then wow – a gusher – a fire hose of urine comes out. I peed like an 18 yr old. I mean like a racehorse. I haven’t peed like this since I was a kid – or maybe ever. Yes I am leaking on my way to the bathroom, but once there, this gusher into the toilet is really unbelievable. The clamp on my urethra that was my prostate gland is now completely gone.

This was my first real eye opening experience with how urinating would be after prostate removal, and wow, what a change it was from how I had urinated just 10 days earlier.

Story #2  Power That I Never Thought I Had

Now I’m still at home and getting used to the new way of urinating and the thought occurs to me … how often does my bathroom smell because my weak stream used to dribble all over the toilet and splash me in the knee caps?

Well, guess what, after prostate surgery, I’m still hitting the porcelain fixture, but now I’m hitting it on the FAR side of the toilet. That is an adjustment to have to make – too much power coming out. A veritable fire hose – not every time mind you, but when my bladder is full – yes – big outward pressure there. Got to aim properly and need to direct the stream down more.

Day to day, my bladder did not fill up that often, because I was leaking all the time, especially in the days and weeks right after surgery. However, as I said before, when I was in a horizontal position, in bed, or on the couch, watching TV or reading a book, I tended to have a little less leakage which caused my bladder to fill up, and then I would get these fire hose moments.

Image by Health Gauge CC by 2.0

Image by Health Gauge CC by 2.0

Story # 3  Last In First Out at The Health Club

I think it was about 6 weeks after robotic surgery when my doc gave me the green light to do pretty much any physical activity that I wanted to. So I started going back to the health club. Actually I had been visiting the health club earlier than 6 weeks post op, but I was barely exerting myself then – now I could let it all hang out.

When you exercise, you’re supposed to drink water, right? So what I usually do, before I even leave the house, is drink a lot of water just to be sure I’m prepped and ready to go once I get there. So after a 15-20 minute drive to the gym, I usually have to urinate as soon as I get there. This is now 3 months after surgery, and I am fully continent and no longer using pads.

So I get there, load my stuff into a locker and walk over to the row of urinals.  On this particular day, there were maybe 4 or 5 other guys in there, so I walk up to one of the last urinals available. I do my business and walk out, and – wait a minute – no one else has left yet. That is, nobody else has left since I walked in. I am the last one in and the first one out. I am done the fastest.

We accountants have an inventory valuation method called LIFO – which stands for Last In / First Out. That was me, my friends. Last in and first out.

P.S. Update.  Actually, this happens to me all the time.  I could be at an airport after getting off a plane or at a restaurant, or any number of places.  Very often, I am the last one in and the first one out of the urinals.

Story # 4  Urinating in the Weeds

When I get up in the morning, the first thing I usually do is drink several small glasses of water, because I’ve read that it’s a healthy practice. You tend to get dehydrated while sleeping at night.

Then I’ll usually have a cup of coffee with breakfast, and we all know that coffee is a diuretic (promotes passing of urine).

One morning after breakfast, I had some yard work to do – dealing with dandelion weeds out on the front lawn. So I’m out there for awhile and guess what, I had to urinate, and pretty badly too, no doubt because of the water I drank that morning and the coffee not helping matters either.

I ask myself, do I want to take my muddy shoes off, go back into the house, use the bathroom, then put my muddy shoes back on and come back out here again? No, I don’t.

I live in a semi-rural area, so I walked over to a wooded section of my back yard, found a hidden spot, whipped it out and let it fly.

The urine stream that came out was totally horizontal – like a fire hose going straight out before falling back to earth way out there. In the house, you kind of have to aim to hit the toilet, so you’ve got to control your stream and not spray all over the place. But outside, there’s no such restriction or problem, so you just let it all out – you let it come out full force and man does it go ! Never saw that kind of action before – I mean not even as a kid to my memory. A full stream of water shooting straight out and then in 10 seconds, I’m done. The tank is empty. Back to work.

Story #5  The Family Party

I attended a family get together for a nephew’s birthday.  You know the parties where the age 20-something guys are drinking large quantities of long-neck bottled beers? I was too, though not in vast quantities – let’s call it limited quantities.

Eventually I had to use the facilities and, whoa, I needed to step back from the toilet – physically step back – because the stream was coming out of me so strong that I was overshooting the toilet. I was hitting the raised toilet seat on the far side.

Had to move back quick – and not just a little bit – maybe like about a foot back before gravity finally pulled the stream back down toward earth (toilet bowl) again.

Story #6  The Business Seminar

hotel meeting room

Image by Porto Bay CC by 2.0

Attended a business seminar and sat in on two morning sessions (9 to 10 and then 10 to 11). They had the usual refreshment bar with water bottles and coffee/tea service.  Sipped a bottle of water through the morning sessions and afterwards had to go to the bathroom.

When a group session lets out, a lot of people head to the bathroom at the same time, so all the urinals were in use except for the one that was hanging low on the wall – you know the one – built for younger gents. So I stepped up to that last available urinal and by the time my urine stream hit the bottom, it made a pretty loud roar or noise. I was making a pretty big racket – so loud that I think I drowned everyone else out. But again, 10 seconds later, I’m done and empty.

Conclusion

These are six stories about my “new adventures” in peeing after prostate surgery. Let me just clarify that on a day to day basis, these type of “headline” events normally do not occur. I just wrote these down because they were memorable at the time. The common theme throughout all of these stories is that my bladder was pretty full at the time.

But it is absolutely true that after MY prostate surgery, every single day, there is no more blockage, no more hesitation, no more feeling like there’s still some urine left even after I’m done. I sleep all night, and for these things, I am very thankful.